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Latest Theory: Tiger’s Wife Could Have Saved Marriage With Big “O”

In the News

Latest Theory: Tiger’s Wife Could Have Saved Marriage With Big “O”

Finally, somebody has figured out why Tiger Woods cheated on his beautiful wife!  There is no way you can dispute the logic of this conclusion…

Tiger sought out other women because Elin was not having enough orgasms in the sack with him, says Dr. John Gray, author of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.

DUH!  Of course.  Why didn’t we realize this before?

The man with an apparent view into their bedroom elaborates:

It’s not just about a matter of having regular sex, she needs to be having an orgasm most of the time, not every time, but most of the time. Clearly, she wasn’t. When a woman has an orgasm in sex, she produces a huge amount of pheromones that attract a man… [Their bad sex] led to him having affairs and her faking orgasms.

Amazing how much he knows about their sex life, isn’t it?  Yes, the affairs are a result of her inability to orgasm!  And here I thought it was because of his inability to keep it in his pants.  Silly me.

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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