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Karl Lagerfeld: You’re All Fat, Chip-Eating Jealous Losers!

Pop Culture

Karl Lagerfeld: You’re All Fat, Chip-Eating Jealous Losers!

If ANYBODY knows real beauty, it’s this good-looking man right here, Karl Lagerfeld.   So when he heard that a popular German magazine was banning hanger-like models from its pages in favor of “real women,” the fashion designer took a moment from feasting on small children for breakfast to impart this pearl of beauty wisdom:

“No one wants to see curvy women.  You’ve got fat mothers with their bags of chips sitting in front of the television and saying thin models are ugly.  Fashion is about dreams and illusions.”

So… anorexic models are all that and a bag of chips, while us mothers are all fat with a bag of chips?

I’m not going to lie — I really do like my Baked Lay’s and TV.  But I can also tell you that it’s my Victoria’s Secret catalogues, not my Vogue magazine, that my husband always steals from me to “read the articles.”

Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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