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Who’s Your Almost Famous Baby Daddy: Celebrity Look-a-Like Sperm Donors

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Who’s Your Almost Famous Baby Daddy: Celebrity Look-a-Like Sperm Donors

Want your baby to look like Tiger Woods but aren’t, um, his wife?   Then you may want to check out Cyrobank, a sperm bank in — where else? — Los Angeles providing clients with links to photos of celebrities who resemble existing donors in a Web feature called Donor Look-a-Likes.

“The goal [of this feature] was not to say you can have a baby that looks like Bob Saget,” Cryobank’s communications manager, Scott Brown told CNN. “The goal was to say this donor happens to resemble this celebrity.”

Well, that’s good.  Because offering mini-Bob Sagets to prospective parents may not be the most lucrative business strategy.

The site offers a search function with donors who sperm bank staff believe resemble actors such as Aaron Eckhart, Jake Gyllenhaal, Errol Flynn and a “young” Russell Crowe (ouch).  Donor Look-a-Likes are not limited to actors — the sperm bank’s vast Web search also includes Tom Brokaw, Tiger Woods, Stephen Colbert, Lance Bass and Adam Carolla.

A baby Lance Bass…?  Awwww.   For those who want their little one to be born with frosted tips!

California Cryobank’s employees spent months sifting through the existing donor list, subjectively matching them with celebrities.  A sperm donor may have a chin, eyes or some physical similarity to stars and was given two to three celebrities he resembled.  The sperm bank does not charge more for specimens from a celebrity look-a-like.

I’d be curious to see how accurate the supposed resemblances are.  One man’s “Ed Harris” could be another man’s Elmer Fudd.  Not that there’s anything wong with that.

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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