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More Men Getting Botox, Er… “Boytox”

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More Men Getting Botox, Er… “Boytox”

Mr. Freeze

Mr. Freeze

Injecting poison and a possible bioterrorism agent into the face:  fun that both genders can enjoy!

According to Time, the number of men getting Botox tripled from 2001 to 2007 — a hot new trend they’re calling “boytox.”  But I’m hoping it’s not too late to popularize “Brotox” instead, because that’s a hell of a lot more fun to say.  Which is all that really matters here.

Although both sexes use the injections to smooth out wrinkles in the forehead, men apparently have some different target areas than women because they want to get rid of vertical lines between their eyebrows, but don’t particularly worry about crow’s feet.

Well, duh.  Everyone knows crow’s feet make men look distinguished, and women just look OLD.  True story.  Just ask any man with crow’s feet.

Also, “boytoxers” are different from “girltoxers” because, “They get so jacked up worrying that it will hurt,” says nine-time Olympic gold medalist Mark Spitz, spokesman for Allergan, the company that produces Botox. “Maybe that’s why women have babies and we don’t.”

Maybe.  There’s also that little womb issue, but… details, details.

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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