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The Laughing Stork’s Celebrity DILF #23: Matthew McConaughey

Celebrities

The Laughing Stork’s Celebrity DILF #23: Matthew McConaughey

Matthew David McConaughey

Deets: 42 years old; born in Uvalde, Texas; actor

Family Low-Down: Has two children, son Levi Alves and daughter Vida Alves McConaughey with fiancee Camila Alves

DILF-able Qualities:  His proclaimed aversion to deodorant places little pressure on you to keep things smelling nice.

What we imagine Matthew’s O-face looks like:

Yes, he likes to make love while listening to his own personal iPhone playlist.

Celebrity DILF #24>>

Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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