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The Irony Report: Alec Baldwin Writing a Parenting Book


The Irony Report: Alec Baldwin Writing a Parenting Book

Illustration by Gallery of the Absurd

I’m a fan of Alec Baldwin — the actor.  His ability to deliver a pompous zinger is unsurpassed:  “The Founding Fathers never intended the poor to live over 40!”   (That’s true, you know.)   His Saturday Night Live appearances always make me chuckle.  (“Chuckle” and “SNL” are rarely uttered in the same sentence these days.)  Not to mention his chest single-handedly possesses enough inventory to provide Locks of Love with a year’s supply of hairpieces.  (Impressive!)

And, yes, parents get fed up and make mistakes sometimes, which could explain the lil’ voicemail he left for his daughter a couple of years ago.   You may have heard about it.  You know, the one where he called her a pig?

But that doesn’t mean I’m clamoring to read a book of PARENTING TIPS from Alec Baldwin — the short-fused father.

In an interview with the family-friendly magazine, Playboy, the 51-year-old actor says:

It will be ironic for some people, but I’m going to write a parenting book.  We’re at, not a crisis, but an awful place right now in terms of parenting. People are raising their children with the belief that we need to be friends with our children.  Kids have too much power and call too many of the shots, telling their parents what they will and won’t do.”

That may be true.  But I won’t have time to read his parenting wisdom, I’m afraid, because I already have a stack of helpful books to comb through — including “Joe Jackson’s Guide to Sensitive Parenting” and “Heading Up the PTA on LSD” by Courtney Love.

Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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