Parents who are concerned about their children’s studies, but not concerned enough to personally pay attention, will be excited about a new study aid on the market: the ol’ ball and chain!
Yes, just set the desired time on the so-called “Study Ball” and attach the 20-pound device to your child’s ankle. A red digital display counts down the “Study Time Left,” and the contraption beeps and unlocks when the time (which cannot exceed four hours) expires.
Because heaven knows your child will NEVER be able to reach his cell phone with a 20-pound ball strapped to him. Hell, kids wear bling around their neck that weighs more than that. These days, I eat BAGS OF CHIPS that weigh more than that! In one sitting.
If interested in this genius invention — and who wouldn’t be, really — you can find it on curiosite.com for about $100.
*SIGH* If only we could go back to the days of yore, when kids had no problem buckling down and plagiarizing CliffsNotes all on their own.