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Ouch: Tooth Fairy Pinching Pennies in This Tight Economy

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Ouch: Tooth Fairy Pinching Pennies in This Tight Economy

As if living in the shadows of Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny isn’t hard enough, now the Tooth Fairy has also been hit hard by the recession.  Yes, a recent survey found that the national going rate for a child’s tooth has seen a 40-cent decline this year: From $3 to $2.60.

As you can see to our right, the recession has also sadly affected the Tooth Fairy’s waxing and gym budget.

What’s worse? A full 10% of kids are reaching under their pillows … and coming up empty. Compare that to last year when just 6% of kids found no reason to flash that increasingly toothless grin.  Ouch.

“It’s a cardinal sin not to (pay),” said Rakshanda Liaqat, a mother of two in Phoenix. “It’s about a child losing a part of her and the warm belief that the tooth fairy will take care of her precious tooth.”

No, it’s about the warm belief that the Tooth Fairy will leave some serious cash money.

“Now, on the other hand, counting the number of teeth your kid loses. And that, too, multiple times in a year? And that, too, having two kids? I can understand the economic recession the Tooth Fairy goes through in terms of her salary.”

Liaqat tried to leave $10 for every tooth her son lost — “but my son didn’t lose much of his teeth after the recession hit.”

“He lost it right on time. Before the debt crisis,” she said. “Amen to that!!”

Ten bucks!  Geesh.  Reminds me of a story about my aunt who left $10 under her grandson’s pillow.  Then, hours later, regretted leaving so much money so she tried multiple times to switch it to a five-dollar-bill, only to have him wake up or roll over every time she tried to do so.

Needless to say, he got his ten bucks.  Well-played, kid.  Well-played, indeed.

Because sharing is caring, as I tell my kids. (Except my wine. Never my wine.)
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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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