Natalie Portman is Engaged, Pregnant, a CIA Spy
Okay, maybe Natalie hasn’t announced the last one yet, but I wouldn’t put it past her. This chick is full of surprises!
The eminently likable actress tells People magazine that she is engaged and pregnant — a headline I had to read, like, twice to make sure it wasn’t just a Christmas cookie overdose-induced mirage. The lucky guy…? 32-year-old Black Swan choreographer and actor Benjamin Millepied*, who is, I must say, rather easy on the eyes. ALMOST as handsome as Mr. Candy. Almost.
(See, ladies? This is the secret to a successful marriage. And I mean it. Just like Mr. Candy meant is when he said I was hotter than Jessica Alba and Charlize Theron combined. Right? …RIGHT?!)
Yeah, I see that look of pity you’re giving me, but I’m too busy stuffing more Christmas cookies in my mouth to respond.
Congrats to the expecting couple!
1. Bug with a thousand legs;
2. From here on out, synonymous with “Natalie Portman’s BabyDaddy”