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Domestic Tip of the Day

Family & Parenting Humor

Domestic Tip of the Day

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Problem:  Your clumsy 20-lb. cat decides to jump on your desk to google “hot kitty Halloween costumes,” knocking your full glass of fruit punch on the floor in the process, and even a professional carpet cleaner is unable to get the damn stain out.

Solution:  Brighten up the area with lovely flowers.  This will not only counteract the ugliness of the stain, but also distract house guests from noticing the stain and instead lead them to wonder, “Why the hell does this nutbag have a vase of flowers in the middle of her rug?”

This has been your Martha Stewart-esque home and garden tip of the day!

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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