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Mother of the Week So Far

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Mother of the Week So Far

Volleyball: It raises, um, emotions among Texans

Parenting, Texas-style:  A woman believed to be the mother of a Texas seventh-grade volleyball player allegedly pulled a gun on a rival team celebrating a resounding win over her daughter’s outmatched squad.

Um… over a volleyball game?  Seriously?  If we were talking about a really heated event like, say, a Scrabble tournament, then I could understand why a parent would be packing heat.  But volleyball?  Just ridiculous.

Girls on the Kirby Middle School (ed. note:  nice name!) volleyball team fled when the woman confronted them with a gun Thursday night in the parking lot and threatened to shoot.  Thankfully, no shots were fired and no one was injured.

“She was irate during the game,” a school district spokesman said. “My understanding, according to the principal, is that the Metzger team lost pretty bad. They were getting hit with balls during the game and were just outmatched.”

Apparently, girls on the Kirby team had left the gym and were walking to their bus after the game, laughing and celebrating, when the woman approached and threatened to kill one or more of them.  At least six witnesses saw the incident.

And if she had fired a shot…?  One of those bad-ass volleyball players would have spiked it right back at her.   Which would have been the most awesome thing ever.

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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