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The Family That Facebooks Together…

Candy's Column

The Family That Facebooks Together…

Much has been made of parents “friending” their children on Facebook — Like, OMG, Mom posted a message calling me “hon!” — but it is important to note that parents aren’t the only family members Facebookers should worry about.  No, sir.  For example, you could also be friended — and this is, um TOTALLY hypothetical (*AHEM*) — by an 11-year-old niece and you think, Oh, this is nice.  We can keep in closer touch now!, only your niece peruses everything you have ever posted on Facebook and it turns out you used the word “hell” in one of your wall posts last year, and had posted photos of you and your husband toasting with various intoxicating libations during your European travels, and your niece — who once looked up to you — is horrified by your surprisingly sinful ways and TATTLES on you, you bad person you, to your sister and mother and you feel so awful about corrupting this young mind that you can’t sleep for several nights and begin to censor EVERYTHING you do and write on Facebook, to the point that even 7th Heaven reruns are edgier than your Facebook musings.

SO stressful.  Hypothetically speaking, of course.

I know, I know… I’m thinking the same thing.  This TOTALLY calls for a Venn Diagram:

The main take-away here being, obviously, that garden gnomes are oddly arousing.  (It must be the beard.)

Because sharing is caring, as I tell my kids. (Except my wine. Never my wine.)
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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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