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The Bad Cat in the Hat

Funny Animal and Pet Photos

The Bad Cat in the Hat

Matty’s litter box aversion has been well-documented on this site.  We have attempted to solve his not-so-little problem with everything from a cat whisperer to anti-depressants to threats of feline military school… and Matty has shown his appreciation for our efforts by leaving even bigger “gifts” for us under the plant in the living room.  Just like Christmas morning!  Gee, thanks for your generosity, Santa Caca.

So I am left with only one remaining option:  revenge.  Revenge in the form of — you guessed it — CAT HATS.  That’s right; I’m going to make this kitty pay for his nasally offensive sins by forcing him to wear humiliating headwear.  Thus launching my new photo series, “The Bad Cat in the Hat.”

I like to call this one Pimp Kitty.

Despite telling the lovely cat hat craftswoman that my kitty required an extra-large “Hollywood Hustler,” the hat barely fit Fatty Matty’s head.  I cackled as I slipped it on his huge noggin, fully anticipating a miserable cat, and you know what…?

THE DAMN CAT LIKED IT.

Because sharing is caring, as I tell my kids. (Except my wine. Never my wine.)
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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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