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World’s Largest Furball Spotted on Our Chair

Candy's Column

World’s Largest Furball Spotted on Our Chair

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I had just finished feeding Miss Skye when Matty decided to join us for some post-dinner conversation.  How he managed to balance all of his twenty-two pounds on the arm of that chair, I’ll never know.  An early Christmas miracle.  He looks regal sitting there, paws crossed just so, but don’t be fooled.  He pooped in the corner of the living room just hours later.  (I am SO wrapping a Pampers Swaddler around his furry ass.)  Also, I’m fairly certain that behind that elegant facade, Fatty Matty is dreaming of dipping that chubby thigh of Skye’s in gravy and chowing down on it for dessert.  Can’t blame him.  I wouldn’t mind a nibble of those cute rolls, myself.

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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