Ballon Boy Parents Foiled by Police, Will Face Criminal Charges

Surprise, surprise:  Authorities plan to file charges against Balloon Boy’s parents for staging the whole “Our Son May Be Stuck in a Homemade Flying Saucer!” routine.

The “a-ha!” moment that led authorities — and the rest of the world with any semblance of common sense — to realize what had happened was when CNN’s Wolf Blitzer asked the six-year-old boy why he had not come out from hiding when they called his name.

“You guys said we did this for the show,” the boy responded.

Promptly followed by a loud THUD! when his father’s heart dropped.

On Sunday, Sheriff Jim Alderden called the incident a “hoax,” adding that investigators believe the evidence indicates that “it was a publicity stunt” by the family in hopes of “better marketing themselves for a reality television show at some point in the future.”

Couldn’t they get a show by going the more traditional route:  by just popping out another five kids?  Geesh.

The parents, Richard and Mayumi Heene, met in a Hollywood acting school and “put on a very good show for us,” Alderden said.  Charges could include conspiracy, contributing to the delinquency of a minor, making a false report to authorities, attempting to influence a public servant, and sticking their child with a VERY unfortunate nickname for the rest of his life.