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Expression of the Day: Age Appropriate

Family & Parenting Humor

Expression of the Day: Age Appropriate

Age Appropriate

Function: adjective

1.  A term frequently thrown around on E!‘s awards show fashion wrap-ups to describe the dresses worn by Helen Mirren, Sigourney Weaver, Glenn Close, etc.

2.  A backhanded way of saying “this is what old chicks should wear.”

2a.  “Old chicks”:  Women old enough to remember life before the VCR.

2b.  “VCR”:  A useless box collecting dust in old chicks’ parents’ basements.

3.  Something that apparently does NOT apply to mini-skirts on women over the age of — GASP! — 30, according to “age appropriateness” expert Glamour magazine (also the gospel in “What to Wear in Your 20s, 30s & 4os!”).

Sentence usage:  “See?  Now that high-necked, long-sleeved, full-coverage muumuu that Phylicia Rashad is wearing is age appropriate!”  (Often from the mouth of somebody such as Jay Manuel, a 37-year-old man who does not wear anything appropriate.)

Because sharing is caring, as I tell my kids. (Except my wine. Never my wine.)
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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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