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Madonna’s Brood May Soon Become as Big as Her Triceps


Madonna’s Brood May Soon Become as Big as Her Triceps

Mommy Madge

After adopting son David Banda, 3, from Malawi in 2006 and informally adopting model Jesus Luz, 21, from the Brazilian catwalks in 2008, Madonna has filed to adopt yet another youngin’:  three-year-old girl, Mercy James, from Malawi.

Madonna reportedly plans to put down her free weights long enough to fly to Malawi this weekend, so she can attend a court hearing on Monday.

“The adoption is going ahead,” Malawi’s Director of Child Welfare Services revealed. “It has been at an advanced stage for some time.”

Added an official at the ministry of Gender and Child Development:  “The girl is from the Mchinji Home of Hope orphanage.  She has no father and mother, they both died…We finished the assessment yesterday in readiness for the courts next week.”

Although the first adoption experience from Malawi wasn’t exactly smooth sailing, observers expect this go-around to be much more painless.  After all, who can turn down Madonna and the Baby Jesus?

Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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