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Breaking: Hillary Clinton is Bringing Headbands Back!

In the News

Breaking: Hillary Clinton is Bringing Headbands Back!

Move over, Mischa Barton — the Original Queen of Headbands is back.

In news that hasn’t worked the media into such a frenzy since Michelle Obama — GASP! — dared to bare her arms, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has dipped into her treasure chest of ’90s fashions to reintroduce her (in)famous headbands.

Yes!  It’s true!

As you can see, Hillary met with Cape Verde’s Prime Minister Jose Maria Neves to underscore U.S. commitment to closer ties, blah, blah, blah — and, more importantly, to show Africans how they, too, can keep cool with the right retro-headwear.

When asked to comment on Hillary’s bold International Headband Reform initiative, Prime Minister Neves shrugged, “Better that than pantsuits, I suppose.”

Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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